I have a problem

I have 5 different leave-in hair cremes in my bathroom. This is probably a little bit excessive. I don't use all of these everyday, but the reason I have this many is because I have a problem. See, when I start to get low I go to the store and buy a new product. But I get so excited about the new product that I start using it right away and don't finish the old one. And that, is how I end up with 5 different hair products that are almost empty and all do basically the same thing.

The tale of the lost retainer

So a few years ago I had a mouth full of metal, and believe me it looked gorgeous. Well, not really. But my teeth looked gorgeous when it was all taken off. And then, after one week of glorious freedom from orthodonture, I was given retainers. I am suppose to wear my retainers every night for the rest of forever, which totally stinks.

Now, to get to the good part. Sometimes when I'm wearing my retainers I take the bottom one out while I sleep and put it on my desk. I guess I just get tired of wearing it. I usually don't even remember taking it out, so it's kind of weird.

Well, the other day I was in the middle of my hour long wake up ritual and still VERY hazy. But in the midst of my sleepy haze I realized I wasn't wearing my bottom retainer any more, so I lifted my head and looked at my desk, and it WASN'T THERE! My first thought was Oh no! I swallowed my retainer! But then reason broke through my mind and I remembered it was too big and weird shaped to swallow and that I probably wouldn't be alive if I had managed to swallow it. I started looking on the floor, but didn't see it. So I decided that I would look for it more when I finally got out of bed.

It was at that moment when I gave up and started snuggling back in my bed that my hand touched something small and hard between my sheets, next to the wall.

Well wouldn't you know it! It was my retainer!

After moving it out of harms way I went back to sleep and my last thought before drifting off was,

I'm glad I didn't swallow it!

Sister

Today is Kelsie's 20th birthday.

So in honor of her annoying presence in my life I present a "The Pictorial Gems of Kelsie Alexandra-dating back to 2005 when pictures start on my computer."

Enjoy.

Kels does not look like a happy camper. She was probably mad at me. Or it could be because she was 13. Either one is a viable option.

Here, Kelsie is realizing how much fun it can be in the stands. Especially when you are attending a football game at a baseball stadium.

Kelsie is notorious for putting stuff under her bed. But, unlike Karlie, her stuff is fairly organized. Kelsie would also hide stuff under her bed. For example she would hide her clean, folded clothes under her bed because she didn't want to put them away and she didn't want Mom to find out they were still out.

Aww, another birthday. Complete with a pink bag too!

Not only does she pull off the hair, but also the black feather boa.

Believe me, I've seen even bigger piles of laundry since this was taken.

A typical skype picture

In her natural habitat.

You're weird.

A not-on-purpose weird face.

Nice hair...

I'm pretty sure she's trying to water bend or something. At this point in the card game she was doing anything to ensure a win.

Jumping for joy that I was graduating!

These pictures make her seem so domestic.

I made the pizza. Not Kelsie. Don't let her fool you. She just wanted to take a picture with my masterpiece.

Isn't she so pretty?

Happy Birthday Sister!

The dark side

She must have heard that the Dark Side has cookies. I hope she thinks the cookies are worth it. Or maybe its the glamor and mystery she's after.

<br /><a href="http://video.msn.com/?mkt=en-us&amp;vid=ff667008-7619-4d07-a800-bb1c8861f3b7&amp;src=OverlayPlayer:embed:&amp;fg=sharenoembed" target="_new" title="Little Girl Chooses The Dark Side">Video: Little Girl Chooses The Dark Side</a>

Green eyed monster...

...of jealousy.

It has taken over my soul.

Want to know why?

Because, Brooke, the TRAITOR, got to play with Barbie's today. She went home to sunny California and played with Barbie's today.

That's why.

And I had to go to school and work, in Utah.

And I have issues growing up and want to play with Barbie's too.

I guess I'll just have to play with my Little Mermaid Barbie sitting on my dresser. It's the only solution. And its SO much more appealing than writing my last paper.

Which reminds me of this video Kelsie shared with me.

Also, I saw this picture of Vanessa Hudgens today when I was catching up on my celebrity gossip.

Did she really think this outfit was a good idea? Everything about it is wrong.

Awkwardness

Don't you just love when you're in a group setting and someone is trying to start a discussion but nobody will respond?

Well, that happened tonight. It was awkward.

It doesn't help when the discussion topic/question doesn't even make sense. Or when all you can think about is how you're missing the last 20 minutes of Chuck to sit in awkward silence.

Kelsie said to offer a suggestion about how to change this, but really I have no idea. I kind of like awkward situations like this because I know that I'm not going to say anything - EVER - and it can be kind of fun to watch people squirm.

Also I found out today that I am no longer a scorpio, but am now a virgo. I'm very upset about this. I don't even know what the description for a scorpio is, but I feel like my whole life has been a lie and that I have to go through a major identity transformation/crisis.

In closing, I would like to share this gem from Bro Haglund, a bishopric counselor in my ward-

"Awkwardness is the pathway to true happiness."

Truer words have never been spoken.

Luckily I grew into my large forehead

I recently cut my bangs. Now bangs are not a new hair style for me. I rocked bangs pretty much from the time my hair started growing until 8th grade, with a small interlude in third grade. In general looking back at pictures of my bangs I guess they weren't that bad. But there were definitely times that I look back and cringe in horror at what I see.

8th grade is a perfect example. In 8th grade I was right in the middle of my awkward years, so luckily there isn't very much pictorial evidence, but the memories are bad enough. My hair changed from straight to curly around that time too, so instead of my bangs drying nice and straight and flat like they did my whole life they started to do funny things. Because of this I had to blow dry them and curl them every morning. To make matters worse if they got wet or if it was humid, my bangs would split in the middle and flip out. Like completely change directions of how I had curled them that morning. It was bad.

You would think that because of all that trouble I would just grow them out, right? Everyone was growing their bangs out, it was the cool things to do.

But see, I had a huge forehead when I was little.

No joke. I'm totally serious.

And someone who I love very dearly told me that I had to have bangs because my forehead was too big to not have bangs. (Recently I was showing my roommates some picture of me without bangs when I was little and one of them said that this was kinda true but that luckily I have grown into my forehead. I was very relieved.)

I remember being jealous of Laura Ingalls Wilder for not having to have bangs and thought that she was a complete idiot when she cut her bangs. I was internally indignant about this. I always thought why in the world would you cut bangs when you have a normal sized forehead!? Besides who wants to curl their bangs with a pencil that you heat over the fire? It was the one shortcoming I found in Laura. It almost ruined my hero worship of her. Just kidding, I don't think that was possible...

But anyways, like I said before I had bangs all growing up, expect in 3rd grade. Most people experience their rebellious streak in high school, but not me, I had mine in 3rd grade. And it was over my bangs.

One day I told my mom that I didn't care if my forehead was too big and that I was growing my bangs out and she couldn't stop me! I think she was tired of me complaining when she trimmed my bangs. Or maybe she just knew that this was going to be my one really rebellious fit.

This ushered in a period of my showing off my large forehead and pinning my bangs back with these heart-shaped glittery clips and way too much gel. I think I was too emotionally involved to make wise fashion choices and can't be held accountable. Eventually, sometime in 4th grade I realized my forehead really was too big and so the bangs made a return.

Now fast forward to right before 9th grade. After the huge 8th grade bang debacle where my bangs took over and grew a mind of their own, I was blessed my the popularity of sideswept bangs. Sideswept bangs solved all of my problems! They generally covered my forehead, but they were easier to control and if they misbehaved you just tucked them behind you're ear. Really, whoever made sideswept bangs popular deserved an Oscar, a Nobel Peace Prize, etc.

Sideswept bangs have been my go-to hairstyle ever since. Recently though I was feeling a little daring, so I cut my bangs again, and I have to say bangs and I have reconciled. I actually love my bangs, and I have gotten a lot of compliments so they might be here to stay awhile. Luckily I no longer have the desire to curl and tease them, and I can control them with a straightener.

As a reward for reading this very long post chronicling the history of my hair, here is a picture timeline of my bangs.

*Note: I could find very few pictures of my "no bangs rebellion" probably because my mom just couldn't bare to have proof that I walked around for several months with out bangs. I really don't blame her, my forehead was huge and probably took over the pictures. Also I refused to have my picture taken in 8th grade so luckily that AWKWARD time in my life is inadequately documented that we could all just pretend it never even happened...

They didn't start out too bad. In fact I really like them. If only I knew what was awaiting me... Eventually even matching Pochahantas sweat suits wouldn't be able cheer me up...

Don't the bangs go perfectly with the sponge-curler hair? It was all th rage among the 2nd graders.

Isn't my forehead HUGE?! If you don't think so, just wait till the next picture...

See what I mean? But its ok, Brendan's looks just a little bigger...

The return of the bangs. Notice the Winnie the Pooh jumper. I was pretty darn cool even then.

It is my personal opinion that from 6th grade through 9th grade the school photographer should just take a step back. We look funny enough without the camera close enough to see every freckle with our faces filling up the ENTIRE picture. See following pictures for further evidence.

I just realized that I also had this weird, reoccuring phase when my bangs just split in the middle. Kinda weird.

The infamous 8th grade bangs. There are no words.

The birth of the sideswept bang. It was a work in progress.

Sideswept bangs were a lifesaver.

And luckily I grew into my forehead.